For the first time in my Dallas Stars fandom, I watched a hockey match played on enemy ice.

As luck would have it, the Stars are making a west coast swing and they started it Friday night at The Anaheim Duck\’s Honda Center. And, so as not to bury the lede, the Stars won 5-2 with new Right Winger Mark Parish making his debut with a hat trick.

So what was it like watching a game in a foreign port? In a word, lonely. There was no one to high-5 after each of the many Dallas\’ scores. I did see a handful of Stars sweaters, tho.

The Honda Center itself had not much to distinguish itself. I did manage to spend $9 for a 16oz cup of beer. Usually at those prices a pair of naked breasts would be shaken in front of me. But that\’s what I get for ordering an \”import\” like Blue Moon. On top of that, the hot dog I got tasted more like vienna sausage than hot dog. On both counts, the AAC wins.

Where the AAC loses, however, is number of douchenozzles wearing ski hats and flat billed hats. And this requires two separate rants.

No one of any intelligence has ever worn a flat billed hat. That\’s a fact and try to disprove it. And I think it is to Dallas\’ credit that I don\’t see them nearly as much there as I do on both coasts. And I know I sound like Grampa Wally when I ask why anyone would want to look like an idiot wearing them. Stop looking stupid.

But what confused me even more was the ski caps. It was 90 today in So Cal. So why the ski caps??? Are we so dedicated to our look that we must wear them no matter the temperature? I know the hot guy in the Abercrombie and Fitch catalog looked sooooooper cooooooool wearing them. But he was outside a chalet, not walking to a hockey game in a desert.

But this just goes to prove how stupid the crowd was. Late in the game, with the Stars up 4-1, the Ducks score a power play goal. To which the crowd begins chanting \”Tuuuuuuuurckooooooooo\”.

Hey!!! Assclowns!!! Your goalie was pulled after 24 minutes. Maybe taunting the oppostion goalie isn\’t the smartest move.